


Frostbite

by LeeAbeille



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, Incest, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-01
Updated: 2013-04-01
Packaged: 2017-12-07 03:25:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/743643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeeAbeille/pseuds/LeeAbeille
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A ficlet set after Thor and before The Avengers. A short glimpse into Thor's grief at the loss of his brother and lover.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Frostbite

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CalamityCain](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CalamityCain/gifts).



> This is a gift fic for Calamity, who urged me to post it here.

Thunder crashed overhead as Thor wrenched the large double doors of Loki’s chamber open. His boots slammed on the marble floor and Mjölnir swung from his fingers, his fury caught somewhere between a temper tantrum and the bloodlust of battle. His arm swung back in a wide arc, his face contorted in rage, cheeks crimson and teeth bared. He was halfway through the motion when he realized he could not wield his hammer here. He had done many foolish things in anger, but he did not yet have the audacity to bring the house of Odin crashing down. Mjölnir slid from his limp grasp, softly coming to rest at his feet. He had come here with the intent of demolishing his brother’s possessions, the books and magic talismans that lined the room, the chair and desk where Loki had studied instead of sparring with Thor, the plush rug that had cushioned him as he explored his brother’s most intimate places, his lips caressing thighs and what lay between them. Those same lips, chapped from the chill of the oncoming winter, trembled at this memory which stood out vividly in his mind’s eye. His brother seemed to be what was truly real; this room around him was but a shadow, the comfort it once held another illusion conjured by Loki that had disappeared along with its creator. Yet he could not destroy this place as the war-like side of his nature bid him to do. Instead, the mighty Thor crumpled, his knees hitting the floor with a resigned thud. His large hands came up to cover his eyes, a sob threatening to choke him. He wept there for what seemed like an age. 

When his tears were spent, still he knelt, scrutinizing the room, engraving it upon his memory as if it could reveal to him the secrets of its former occupant. Gradually, he became aware that night had fallen. He briefly considered returning to his own room, perhaps with a comely maid to occupy the endless expanse of time until dawn. This thought was fleeting, however. His brother’s bed beckoned. Thor tried to get up but his knees buckled, rebelling after so long on the floor. He cursed. Crawling to the bed, Thor reflected bitterly that Loki would relish the sight of the state to which he had reduced his golden brother. He hauled himself up onto the bed, not even bothering to remove his tunic or boots. The bed furs caressed him invitingly and he surrendered, body relaxing as his nose inhaled the lingering scent of his brother, musk and wind that heralds snow and the vaguely metallic odor of magic. A thousand thoughts swirled in Thor’s mind. He had not thought enough when Loki was here and now it was too late. Many mortal lifetimes full of things unsaid were doomed to haunt Thor. This seemed to his brother to be Loki’s greatest trick: He had made Thor love him. And he had not even lived to see the results of his good work. As these all-too-familiar musings ran through the god’s head, he drifted into a restless sleep.

He met Loki in a wood, the dark, skeletal trees heavy with snow. Loki smiled, a feral gesture reminiscent of ice and deceit. Thor crept toward him, moving from between the trees to come face-to-face with the trickster in the clearing. Thor reached out. Loki’s lips were a shock when they met his, fire in the midst of frostbite. The kiss, a familiar dance, soon grew hungry. Thor’s eyes drifted shut, a tongue tangling with his own. Suddenly, the mouth against him grew frigid. His eyes snapped open to meet a crimson gaze, two rubies in a setting of midnight blue skin. His scream was swallowed by the Jotun before him.

When he woke, he was sweating, fists bunched in fur. He knew the Loki of his dream had been the true Loki. A frost giant of Jotunheim. His brother had always been lies ad mischief and chaos, but Thor had fancied he had found the Liesmith’s heart. A bitter laugh escaped Thor’s lips. He had found a truth far less palatable than his former one had been. An icebound heart, full of hatred and desperation. That was the truth of Loki Laufeyson. 

And yet…Thor could not help but love him. He longed for a harsh word from his not-brother, spoken in that fond tone reserved only for Thor. He could almost feel that graceful, lithe body against him, the ink black locks underneath his fingertips. It was when he had lain in this attitude with Loki that Thor had found tranquility, an easy state of mind. Perhaps even happiness. But he had used his brother ill, not taken him seriously when he so desperately needed to be heard. Their love-making had been a battle and Thor had never told Loki what their brief, tender truces that played at being love had meant to him.

Face buried in fur, heart buried in regret, the god of thunder whispered:

“You gave me peace in a lifetime of war.” 

And he slept, hoping to meet his love in the woods again.

**Author's Note:**

> This ficlet was also posted on my Tumblr (breathsolidified) a few months ago. It's my first attempt at fan fiction so please let me know what you think! "You gave me peace in a lifetime of war” is a quote from the movie Troy (2004) which always makes me think of Thor/Loki.


End file.
